Summer's End Worries
So its the second to last day of camp and I find myself very discouraged.
There's is so much fear in my heart right now. I dont fear doing long distance again. I dont fear the fact that i have no place to live. I dont fear that I'm not going to get the right classes...
...I fear complacency. Already I can feel my heart preparing itself to get back into the same routine state its in during the year. I feel the liveliness leaving and the procrastination and laziness approaching. The excitement to change is slowly slipping and being replaced by the dreadful thought of complacency. I find myself saying I'm ready to leave camp and get back to my life in Sacramento but then I find myself fearing all that that entails. I fear that I will lose my desire. My heart's true desire is to grow up. I fear that I won't do this. I'll just get stuck in my daily routine of work and school and make no time for anything else. I dont want my life to become that dull circular rotation. That is my biggest fear...complacency.
Please God, let me change...move my feet so that they dont become content to stop at any one step.
There's is so much fear in my heart right now. I dont fear doing long distance again. I dont fear the fact that i have no place to live. I dont fear that I'm not going to get the right classes...
...I fear complacency. Already I can feel my heart preparing itself to get back into the same routine state its in during the year. I feel the liveliness leaving and the procrastination and laziness approaching. The excitement to change is slowly slipping and being replaced by the dreadful thought of complacency. I find myself saying I'm ready to leave camp and get back to my life in Sacramento but then I find myself fearing all that that entails. I fear that I will lose my desire. My heart's true desire is to grow up. I fear that I won't do this. I'll just get stuck in my daily routine of work and school and make no time for anything else. I dont want my life to become that dull circular rotation. That is my biggest fear...complacency.
Please God, let me change...move my feet so that they dont become content to stop at any one step.
posted by stacey at 4:14 PM
3 Comments:
i'll pray you too...
and you are always welcomed with us...if you need it.
hey remember I'll be around for you. I'm excited for you to come home so we can hang out again!!! I move the 19th... so feel free to come join us ;) jk. mingle with you soon!!
Stace I miss you already. I really didn't get to tell you a real goodbye. But just so you know, I am at about a 48%. We'll see what happens. I hope you are happy to be back in your apartment. talk to you soon
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